Bingin

I don't think I completely understand how this happens.

You do so well, amazing.. several days of fasting or close to fasting in a row. Hunger is rare. It's easy to say no to food, and even easier to say no to bad foods. But once you eat two normal meals in one day.. that suddenly gives you the urge to eat everything around you? Even if you're not hungry? Even if you mostly don't even want to?

Last night I indulged in pizza... The entire veggie pizza that has been sitting in my refrigerator for the past week and a half. I my tummy wasn't saying it was hungry.. but my brain just kept saying, " it's probably okay if you have this pizza.. why don't you just cook it and have one small slice? That way your room mates can have the rest when they get home" So, I cooked it.. and I just kept going back to the kitchen after every slice and inhaling the slices as they were air.

Now I'm sitting here worrying, and have been worrying all day because of how much damned food I ate yesterday.. Worrying about how long it will take to work an entire flippin' pizza off. I think I'm going to make a new rule.. and make sure to stick with it: when I eat, I will only eat around other people. I think it'll  (hopefully) decrease the likelihood of binging/over eating in the future.